


I Think I Love You

by purplemonster



Category: GOT7
Genre: M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-09
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2020-06-25 10:29:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19743847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/purplemonster/pseuds/purplemonster
Summary: Jaebum keeps quiet. But he does think. And he’s scared that one day his thoughts might just slip through his mouth and Jinyoung would hear it all.





	I Think I Love You

It’s easy to forget things when you’re balls deep inside Jinyoung.

Jaebum never really bothers to think anymore when he has his hands full of Jinyoung’s ass and the sound of his moans filling his ears. The way Jinyoung moves to meet him with so much eagerness, welcoming him and riding him, causes all of Jaebum’s coherent thoughts to fly out the window. Being with him in moments like these dull all of his senses and the only thing left he feels is the heat that continues to grow in the pit of his stomach.

But these days it’s different. These days, when Jinyoung is in his lap and he’s kissing him softly, a prelude to what Jaebum knows will turn out into something more, all Jaebum can think about is that he likes Jinyoung enough to want to do this for the rest of his life. When Jinyoung closes his eyes and arches his back whenever Jaebum sinks to his knees and takes him in his mouth, Jaebum thinks how he’d like to take care of Jinyoung forever. When Jinyoung comes, white spilling in his hand, in the sheets, or in some occasions when he’s inside Jaebum and fills him up, Jaebum thinks how there’s never going to be someone else in his life that can make him feel the way Jinyoung does to him.

He thinks. A lot. When they’re together. When they’re not together. And it’s always how he thinks he loves Jinyoung. He thinks. Because he’s not entirely sure. And besides, Jinyoung never really says anything about whatever they’re doing. The guy might not even feel the same way back. That’s the part he mostly dwells on. So there’s really no reason to say what he feels out loud.

Jaebum keeps quiet. But he does think. And he’s scared that one day his thoughts might just slip through his mouth and Jinyoung would hear it all.

***

He doesn’t know how he manages to keep it all in. He and Jinyoung have been under one roof for as long as he can remember that it was impossible not to stop thinking things. Even the move hadn’t done anything to quiet his thoughts. They’ve all decided to move out of the dorms and live separately. But it’s Jinyoung that still comes over a lot and Jaebum visits him just as often as well so nothing has changed.

Jaebum’s only outlet is music. He writes about love songs filled with yearning, guilt, regret, and passion. Yugyeom and Bambam always say it’s cheesy. Youngjae thinks it’s sexy. Jackson likes to joke around and say he’s hiding a non celebrity girlfriend he can’t bang all the time that’s why he’s making these. Mark thinks it’s very much a Jaebum song, whatever that means. And Jinyoung, well, he says he likes everything he makes. Which is good because everything Jaebum makes is all about him anyway.

He always comes so close to telling him how he really feels. Whenever they make out behind closed doors or just cuddling under the sheets, Jaebum wants to whisper it to his ears. The songs get more and more personal every album. Jaebum’s thoughts get more persistent everytime Jinyoung smiles at him, kisses him, fucks him. Jaebum dances to let go of it all. He writes songs, arranges them, sings them until his lungs burst.

And one day, he finally cracks.

***

His members love it. JYP loves it. The fans love it. It’s everyone’s favorite song to jam to and Jaebum thinks he must’ve been drunk to even let this get too far.

The song did nothing to quiet his thoughts. But it does give him a way to tell Jinyoung out loud how he feels. _I think I love you_. That’s the line. And Jaebum is shameless enough to sneak a peak sometimes at Jinyoung during that part and sing it to him. He shares the line with Jackson so it’s not too obvious (and well, Jaebum kinda likes the way Jackson’s voice fits that part perfectly too). It’s a fun upbeat song. No one would be able to know the real deal behind it.

No one would know that’s the only way to seal the cracks that are starting to form around Jaebum’s sanity.

***

Of course the song would make its way into their concert set list. Everyone liked it so much, even their choreographer, that he took the time out to make a whole new dance for it. Somehow, that made things worse.

Jinyoung is a good dancer. A little too good if you ask Jaebum. It’s kind of a treat really to have the guy you’ve dedicated the song to, to dance it with so much gusto. Jinyoung is sexy, alluring, and a flirt on stage. Jaebum is so smitten by him it’s insane he hasn’t blurt what he’s feeling out loud by now.

So one can imagine how that must feel like for him to have Jinyoung running his hand over his hair, his thighs gloriously displayed to the crowd as he shows off the dance to his song. He’s enjoying it and Jaebum is at a loss as to what exactly he’s supposed to feel about this.

***

Concerts are a welcoming kind of stress. It’s like being on a playground but knowing that there are thousands of people watching you. Jaebum doesn’t mind. He can get lost in it all. The lights, the music, the dance. There’s also the heat, the intensity of the fans’ screaming and chanting. It’s like being high on adrenaline and happiness. It’s the best part of his job.

So when his song comes on midway, he’s already sort of floating. He’s not tired but he feels delirious. He’s dancing to the beat, smiling at the crowd, laughing at his friends and truly having a good time.

And then, it happens. It’s like time slowing down especially for that moment. The line comes on. The special line he wrote for Jinyoung. It’s Jackson who sings it. But at that moment, it’s Jinyoung who turns to him, the lights beautifully shining down on his face, as he mouths the words to him.

_I think I love you._

And Jaebum swears in that moment time stood still and all he can think about is wanting tell him

_I do too._

***

Jaebum has avoided Jinyoung before. There had been many times when he hid from him because the latter wanted extra dance practices and Jaebum couldn’t go on any longer because his legs hurt. Or during that time for Verse 2 when Jinyoung wanted to redo some of their songs even when Jaebum assured him it was fine. They were all work related and all because Jinyoung was a perfectionist.

But this time, Jaebum is trying to avoid him during the after party by being on the dance floor with a bunch of their team staff and crew.

Jinyoung has been looking for him, they said. All Jaebum can reply is _later_. It’s not that he doesn’t want to see him. It’s because he’s starting to think again. He can’t help it. He’s thinking of Jinyoung telling him he loves him. Or maybe that didn’t count because he wasn’t actually telling him but singing along. But then again, why would Jinyoung look at him when he sang that?

It’s these little things that continue to drive him insane.

He’s trying to balance all his thoughts when someone steps right next to him, handing him a drink. It’s Jinyoung.

“You’ve been dancing for hours. Don’t you think you need a break?” He says.

He’s so beautiful. They’ve all changed into something else after the concert. Something a little less tight and a little more comfortable. Jinyoung is dressed in both a loose shirt with tight fitting black pants. How he makes such simple clothing look effortlessly sexy is beyond Jaebum’s capacity of thinking.

Jaebum takes the drink from him and tips his head back as he downs it.

“I’m good.” He responds despite his throat burning from the alcohol.

Jinyoung eyes him. “Fine. I’ll dance with you then.”

Jinyoung doesn’t wait for an answer as he dances next to him. Jaebum can’t help but rest his hands on Jinyoung’s hips, moving to the beat of the music. Jinyoung steps into him then, his back to Jaebum’s chest as he grinds against his front. His ass rubs against his crotch that Jaebum can’t help but gyrate to.

Like this, it’s as if they’re back to the good old days wherein both of them are just flirting their way to each other. It’s familiar ground but one that Jaebum does a lot of reading into these days. They never really talked about what this was, which was probably why Jaebum does a lot of thinking. He was Jinyoung’s booty call at times and vice versa. But booty calls have turned into date nights and cuddles that the line is blurry to him now.

Jinyoung turns to face him and Jaebum can see his cheeks already flushed from the heat.

“You’ve been avoiding me.” He says, loud enough that only Jaebum can hear even when there are bodies dancing around them.

“Have I?” Jaebum responds.

“And here I thought you wanted to talk.”

“About what?” Jaebum asks.

“How I think I love you and how you should ought to know.”

Jaebum stops dancing at that. Jinyoung looks at him and smiles.

“That song was for me, wasn’t it?”

Jaebum isn’t sure what gave it away. Were his songs that obvious now for Jinyoung to catch on? Was he wearing his heart on his sleeve too much?

“Don’t give me that look.” Jinyoung chuckles and Jaebum belatedly realizes he’s staring in shock at him for quite some time. “Haven’t you seen this coming?”

For the first time in a long while Jaebum is left with no words and with no thoughts. The dance floor is loud and filled with people but it’s as if it’s only him and Jinyoung at the moment.

“Hey,” Jinyoung pouts. “Why aren’t you saying anything? Have I gotten it all wrong?”

Jaebum replies by taking Jinyoung’s hand. Lacing them with his own, he leads him out of the dancefloor, out of the bodies pressing around them, out of the music and the lights, to somewhere quiet where no noise, no sound, and not even his thoughts can interrupt them.

They only go as far as the parking lot and inside one of their vans. It’s the only private place that’s available at the moment. But it was perfect for the second the van doors close, Jaebum says out loud what he has been wanting to say for the longest time,

“I love you.”

Jinyoung blinks at that.

“That was quick.”

“And late. So late. I’m sorry.” Jaebum apologizes. “But believe me when I say I’ve been keeping that to myself for so long.”

“How long?” Jinyoung asks.

“Just…” Jaebum waves his hand in the air. “Long enough?”

“And why haven’t you said anything?”

Jaebum gives him a sheepish look.

“It’s the obvious. I was scared. I didn’t know if you’d feel the same way. I was an idiot. I wasn’t sure. Take your pick.”

Jinyoung just eyes him. “I’d like to go with you were an idiot.”

Well, Jaebum can’t complain.

“But you’re sure now, right?”

It’s the way Jinyoung asks. Unsure. Careful. Like how could he even doubt that? It makes Jaebum lean forward and kiss the side of his head in assurance.

“Very sure. You have no idea how much i’ve been thinking about it. All those songs were about you. Not just Page. That’s how much I’ve been wanting to tell you all these years. All those songs. They were for you.”

Jinyoung grins. “That’s kind of romantic.”

“And very cheesy now that i’ve said it out loud.” Jaebum groans.

Jinyoung smacks his arm playfully.

“You’ll stop then?”

Jaebum leans towards him again. This time, he makes sure his lips are brushing against Jinyoung’s.

“I already have the next one written in my head.”

Jinyoung smiles, kisses him, and Jaebum doesn’t bother to think what will come next.

***

He wakes up all warm and comfy, realizing it’s all because Jinyoung is wrapped around him. Jaebum blinks in the sunlight, trying his best to remember what got them in this position. And when he does so, he makes a small sigh in contentment.

They had made out in the van, halting it just long enough to wait until they can get back home, and then picking up where they left off. Sex was always great with Jinyoung. But last night was amazing considering his thoughts were no longer about what ifs and were only filled with how to please him.

Jinyoung stirs a few minutes later. Jaebum stills so he doesn’t wake him up. He caught a glimpse of the time earlier. It’s much too early for any one of them to be awake. So he stills so Jinyoung can go back to sleep.

But he doesn’t. Jinyoung’s eyes slowly flutter open when it meets his and he gives him a drowsy smile. Jaebum has never seen anyone waking up so beautifully.

“You alright?” Jaebum asks, voice still a whisper. They went a little rough last night. It’s a kink they both have that Jaebum is still too shy to admit and one that Jinyoung indulges him with without asking about it. There’s so much they know about each other without talking. That’s why Jaebum fell for him in the first place. They both know each other inside and out.

Jinyoung nods and gives a little purring sound that has Jaebum hold him in his arms a little closer.

“My legs feel cramped but other than that i’m fine.”

Jaebum moves to give him more space but Jinyoung only burrows deeper in the crook of his neck. Jaebum smiles.

He remembers that night again. That song. That line. _I think I love you._

“I really do, you know.” Jaebum says.

“What?” Jinyoung asks sleepily.

“Love you.”

Jinyoung smiles at that.

“I know.”

And it really is a good thing that he finally does.

**Author's Note:**

> Page is my fave song in the new album and that fancam of Jinyoung mouthing that line to Jaebum just really sent my heart afluttering. I’m trash.


End file.
